


Casey

by Hayden Smith (MrSmythe)



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Anxiety, Canon Trans Character, Depression, Gen, Gender Dysphoria, Humanstuck, Mental Health Issues, Trans Character, Trans Female Character
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-03-04
Updated: 2014-03-04
Packaged: 2018-01-14 14:04:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,121
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1269109
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MrSmythe/pseuds/Hayden%20Smith
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Casey Egbert’s sixteenth birthday is in six months. Before she reaches that pivotal point, she must announce to her father that she is a young woman, as opposed to being male as assigned at birth, to complete the agreement she made with her therapist. This is far from her only challenge to tackle; this year, she will start at a new school, make new friends, meet new relatives, and decide whether to present as a boy or a girl in each new situation. All the while, she must deal with her depression, panic disorder, and dysphoria, preventing it from getting out of hand like last year. And maybe, just maybe, she’ll get a chance to end her search for her birth mother amid the chaos.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Casey

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first major fanfiction - hopefully the first of many. It was inspired by an old request on tumblr's transstuck blog. I decided to keep the main focus on Casey, but you'll still get plenty of your favorite canon characters. They're just all grown up in this AU. Thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoy!

“You’re going to have to tell him eventually.”

Casey’s stomach twisted in knots as her therapist, Rose Lalonde, took a quiet sip of her tea and gently placed it back down on the coffee table. She pretended not to hear her. Ms. Lalonde continued on.

“If you really do go through with your transition this year, he’ll find out on his own, you know,” she said in a manner that wasn’t quite scolding, but still quite severe. She crossed her legs and folded her hands over her knee, waiting patiently for her client to muster up the courage to make a proper reply.

Finally, Casey quietly muttered, “I don’t plan on wearing girl clothes around the house...” Rose smirked and gave her a knowing look, silently reprimanding her for her weak comeback. Casey refused to meet her eye and continued playing with the hem of her t-shirt as Ms. Lalonde added, “Do you really think it’s a smart idea to argue with the one who agreed to help you buy those clothes?”

Casey jolted and immediately began pleading with her. “I’m sorry! Please, don’t take that back - I’m just not ready - I’m sure I can - ”

Rose held up a hand. “Casey, please calm down. I’m not going to do anything like that. That was my mistake for teasing you. Now, you do know I wish to help you in becoming the proper sex, correct?”

Casey nodded sheepishly and shifted her gaze back to her shoes, embarrassed by her outburst.

“And you know I wouldn’t dream of doing anything you weren’t ready for, don’t you?”

“Well… yes. I just thought -”

“I know what you thought, Casey. It was a mistake on my part, and I apologize,” Ms. Lalonde said, patience in her voice. “I’m not forcing you to tell your father. I’m just letting you know that you’ll have to at some point in order to prepare you for it. Tell you what,” she chirped, as much as her dark, soothing voice could chirp, and slapped her knee. “Why don’t we make a little deal?”

Casey warily met her eye. “What sort of deal?”

“I will continue actively walking you through this early transition, so long as you,” she said with a cat-like grin, “will tell your father about your gender identity by your sixteenth birthday. You’ll have plenty of time presenting as a girl under your belt by then, and it should help to convince him.” She stood and extended her hand. “Do we have a deal?”

Casey thought, then slowly smiled and shook her hand. Her birthday wasn’t for another six months; she’d have plenty of time to prepare. How hard could it be?

“It’s a deal.”

* * *

Casey hopped in the passenger’s seat of her father’s truck, slamming the door behind her and startling the dozing owner. He quickly rose to a ridiculous combat position. Laughter bubbled over, first from Casey, then from her dad, and erupted into a hysterical father-daughter moment - or father-son, in the eyes of the father.

As her smile faded, he broadened his, if only to keep the mood. “How was your session?”

Any trace of the joy left on Casey’s face quickly vanished as she averted her eyes, buckled up, and responded with a mumble of “fine.”

“Casey Khorshid Egbert,” John began in his teasing tone, pretending to lecture her as he started the car, “You say that every time you come out of there. Why not spice it up a bit? ‘Oh, Dad, today, while I was telling Ms. Lalonde how great you are,’” - earning him an eye-roll and a grin from Casey - “‘a giant salamander leapt down through the ceiling! Before I can say anything, I get pushed to the ground with Ms. Lalonde shielding me. She started screaming, “He's got a gun!” and we ran out!’"

Casey's smile became heavy laughter as her father's story came to a close. John stopped his wild gesturing for a moment to admire his handiwork before refocusing on the road. "That would be something," he said, his goofy grin from before switching to a much fainter, pleased smile.

"Sorry, Dad; they can't all be winners," she said with a smirk, her laugh becoming just barely tinged with bitterness. John took notice.

He didn’t say anything. Rather, he forced his broad, silly smile to return to his face; thankfully, it didn’t seem to be false, as he had years of practice under his belt to create very natural, cheerful expressions. Casey, still just a bit too young to recognize the miniscule tells to his false joy that even old habits couldn’t erase, simply rolled her eyes and turned her piercing gaze to the window. If looks could kill, there would have been a trail of dead trees leading the way to the Egbert household.

Not a full moment after the truck was parked in one of the two-car garages of their too-large home, Casey was out of the car and walking through the doorway into the kitchen with John close behind her. “Casey?” he called tentatively, passing through the kitchen to the dining room to the living room. “Casey, where -”

“I’m upstairs,” she called down from the indoor balcony just above him. “I’m going to go do some homework.”

“On a saturday?” he asked, puzzled.

“Excuse me for trying to be a good kid,” she bitterly shouted back. 

“Hey, now, there’s no need to act like that -”

“I’ll be in my room,” she said over her shoulder, rushing to her personal sanctuary and barely falling short of slamming the door.

Casey heard John shout up to her from outside, “I’ll - I’ll call you down for dinner!”

She hit her forehead on the door and sighed. How many more hints would she have to drop before he understood? He couldn’t even grasp her dislike for discussing therapy; how could he fathom his “son” being a girl?

She shook her head and turned to the full-length mirror beside her bed, snarling at what she saw. Peeling off her nondescript t-shirt and khaki shorts, she turned to her vanity and rifled through the bottom drawer to find the only pieces of feminine clothing she had managed to sneak into her house. Casey slipped on the tights, then the skirt, then the push-up bra. She still didn’t have a proper blouse. She did, however, have a pink dress shirt in her closet.

She took it out and buttoned it up with care before neatly tucking it into the pale blue lace hem of her skirt. She glanced in the mirror, and a tiny smile appeared on her face. She thought the ballet-pink tights matched well with the shirt. She almost looked like a normal girl.

Well… besides the lack of shoes.


End file.
